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JP in a precise time.
You came along and captured me [amazing solo] …
僕はカムちゃんがいなくてとても寂しいです。
(Camu’ :3) Okay it’s me writing, I suck at it, I rather do it in english(not good english) cause in spanish this would fucking kill me. I’m having one of the toughest moments ever, because of her, because of my family, because of my grades, because of my future, because of the bitch called summer. [There it was me smoking just tobacco in a pretty crowded place, thinking about her and how cool it’d be if she was there with me. “I’v got to know about her right fucking now, let’s see twitter, nothin, facebook, fuckin nothing, i remembered her password” I read some not cool stuff “Man, this is not okay, why is she doing that, wtf?, yep i’m so wrong, i’m too kind to be treated that way” (…)] SHE used to be sweet with me, I think no one made that happy, sex is just sex, it’s not the same shit, that was better, just as a way to lie to myself I try to keep the idea I was too high when I sent her that message, the wrong part of my brain won, after coming back to normal I hated - hate myself in the maximum level, there’s a long queue of haters, but bitches please i’m in the 1st place. I read her last post on her blog, I can’t lie, tears appeared. This sucks I must tell her how I feel, how i’d love to kiss her, touching her hands and her hair, tell her I really love her (yes because, no fucking girl has made me reached this point, if it’s not fuckin love, then there should be some other word for this feeling, maybe in german, they have lots of words for everything.) I’m not the guy who falls in love and says it out loud, who drinks and says it out loud, who smokes and says it out loud, who scores and says it out loud; I just live and try lots of things, i’m selfish by the way, Yes, I was wrong, wrong, wrong. I only wish I was with her again and get to know her better, but it seems that won’t happen now, she really avoids me, wish she didn’t… |
